Dating a woman who was sexually abused as a child

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Some avoid sexual relationships as not to invite the possibility of rejection.

When suffering with low self-esteem issues, it is believed to be best to strike the first blow and remain in control – by avoiding the relationship in the first place, so you won’t be rejected later on because of your “worthlessness or shame” (what the victim believes about themselves).

Promiscuity came mean a string of empty relationships or it may lead to prostitution, working in strip clubs or being hired out as an “escort.” Most women working in strip clubs will attest to being sexually abused as children.

With each meaningless sexual act, the victim dies a little more inside, but they are usually too numb to notice.

In addition, the secrecy and often the fear of exposure creates a sense of shame, guilt and confusion that disrupts the child's "internal working model" according to which we all interpret the world.

This affects how children and then adults understand and construe the motives and behaviours of others, and how they handle stressful life events.

How an individual reacts and copes to being exposed to a sexual relationship before they were mature enough to understand and handle it will vary from person to person.

Sex no longer holds the value it should; it simply becomes the means to an end.

Often the mentality is that the victim is so used to being used, that it doesn’t matter anymore.

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When someone has been sexually abused at an early age, how they view sex becomes altered.

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